I never seem to give up. I am still here no matter what. All the failures, I take them with me.

and my hell is called life.

If your feet were to be hit by a hammer as many times as they hit the ground during a five minutes run, then you would see how much those five minutes matter.

is just an excuse to not do something.

there is only first day or first time.

but so is the confidence.

just feelings.

we listen to answer.

What if there was only the journey? And the goal was to make that journey as comfortable as possible instead of tirelessly working to reach whatever destination we might never reach? What if the journey was the destination, and you were already on one? What if you have already reached your destination? What if this…

If the environment you grew up in told you that it is not safe to be yourself, the people you were surrounded with were critical and short-tempered, were lacking patience and understanding, let alone moral support was a no show, then you learned to survive, you learned not to be yourself, you retreated to avoid…

is not an accurate assessment of how your are, it is an accurate assessment of how they are.

I know it, I can feel it. It doesn’t feel like winning, yet, it feels like struggling but the resilience is stronger each day a bit more, the feeling of it being hard is very real, it is hard, fighting your own demons might be one of the hardest thing to overcome at the game…

well not at first, but in the aftermath.

is failure. How much more humble do I have to be, though?

the one that we think we are (more accurately, that we wished we were but are not), and the one that we really are (more accurately, that we pretend we are not or have not yet accepted the fact that we are).

Understanding yourself? Knowing yourself? Examining your own behavioral patterns? Facing the stripped-bare truth? No matter which truth it is, no matter how far from our own self-inflated ego it is, no matter how far it is from what we blindly thought we were for years, and accept it?

from a place of love, not from a place of fear.

What about Practice what you want your tomorrow to look like, and the day after, and the day after, and the day after, instead?

high thick walls to protect oneself from anything, but mostly from anyone. And they do keep everyone and everything at bay, those high thick walls, except maybe one thing, loneliness.

I had not realised how deep despair could be, I knew it could exist, but it was wrongly measured. Now I know, one’s upbringing can wreck one badly for years if one does not pay attention, actually, even if one pays attention, the harm is so great that one can do very little against it.…

I must have misplaced it a long time, I cannot remember where it is, or even how to find it. What? Happiness.

does one has to hit rock bottom before having enough momentum to escape the darkness and never go back?

Where does one get that? One builds it, usually with the help of rejection, bad days and failure.

by setting ridiculously high goals (it is ridiculous but one only sees it after the fact not before), and one does so for various reasons: overestimating one’s abilities, being overly optimistic presumptuous (failure will quickly fix that one by forcing one to be remembered to stay humble, always), wanting quick success (nothing quick has ever…

but in a sea of misinformation.

And in this unpleasant instance, I am being remembered to stay humble, no matter how much or how little I achieve, which, in the end, does soften the blow.

they seldom produce good work.”